So much going on

credits: Wintergreen by Mags Graphics and Winter Magic 

by Aprilisa Designs, Challenge word art by 

Kristmess, snowman paintings Fair Use from the Internet

Too much going on too? I have two big problems that I'm working on. I am proud to say that I actually am working on both of them. More on that in a minute…

Don't you just love the scrapbook page that started off my blog? I say that with all kinds of pride and I'm not sorry for stroking my own ego. I made that (No I didn't draw the pictures, I can't draw, but I did put it out to gather into a scrapbook page) and I’m very happy with how it turned out. The line referring to children making snowmen as “outdoor Michelangelos making Davids” is one I came up with many years ago and my husband David said it was too much to use on Christmas card. So I knew that eventually I wanted to use it for a scrapbook page and put that single line on a word document and then switched it to a pages document when I changed back to Mac. That's how long I was holding onto that line until I had time to create a scrapbook page I thought was worthy of it. I am VERY proud of that page.


All of my gifts and gift wrap are here and ready for me to put together, or anyway, ask David and/or my aides to put together for me.

To add to my pre-holiday excitement, I just found out that my niece, Rina, will be at my dad’s on Christmas Day after all! Originally, a first year assistant manager, of course has the short straw when it came to getting a holiday off and although she isn't working on Christmas was originally scheduled for Christmas Eve and the day after Christmas leaving no way she was going to drive all the way up to Michigan for Christmas day to turn around four hours later and go back to Indianapolis. As it works out she was able to get the schedule manipulated so that she can be in Michigan for the Christmas Eve feast at my cousin’s and for Christmas morning at Pop’s. I'm sure she feels great about it for her, but I will admit wholeheartedly that I personally feel blessed. I'm not so mobile and therefore not able to see my nieces anymore than once or twice a year now. Good thing at over 50 I'm still well-versed in the way 20-somethings communicate.

All I really need now is to get my wool cape dry cleaned and either spend a night driving around looking at Christmas lights or finding a night that's not quite so cold to go to the zoo and see The Lights Before Christmas. If that can't happen I'll settle for making some space for my little 2 foot tree.

The Lights Before Christmas at the Toledo zoo, 2011

Now back to my two problems. First problem, as I'm going backwards in years, is my hands. First let me describe what MS hands are like. My description of what my untreated hands feel like is imagine that your hands are twice the size that they are, almost like there's a second skin that's blown up over top of your regular hands and inside that second skin it's packed full of tiny buzzing insects and day and night that's all you feel is swollen hands stiffened by the fact that they're packed with these buzzing insects. I've tried so many different kinds of prescribed drugs and dry skin lotions so that I could use my hands, grab more things without dropping them and even type. Frustratingly, nothing was working, one of the drugs even made me sleep so soundly that I’d wake up not knowing what time of day it was and sometimes not even knowing where I was. As a thinker and a control freak THAT was not acceptable!

But now, I've become part of the cannabis generation! I have not taken up smoking or seriously doing drugs. But I use CBD ointment, which is basically the healing part of marijuana without the THC that makes you high (and gives you the munchies which I really don't need right now.) I use a combination of serum and the lotion. And I've been experimenting now with a 3X lotion that I can really feel when I put it on and it starts clearing up my hands right away. The 3X unfortunately stands for triple strength and triple price. But if it works and I can actually feel things and use my fingers to type or at least fix errors that using speech to text makes, might make it worth swallowing the extra cost.

Then there's the other problem that I'm fixing. I'm actually talking with a therapist again to help me sort out the fact that I have a huge list of priorities that's so overwhelming I can't prioritize all the priorities. I've worked with a therapist and psychologist before and as I've said in the past they are the most wonderful people in the world. I think the number one thing is that you have to be open to allowing them to help you and you have to accept that helping you is not doing it for you but it's helping you find it in yourself to do it for yourself. I'm not gonna say that it's difficult or that it's easy, that it's quick or takes forever. That depends on what the problems are that you are brave enough to tackle and strong enough to realize that you can't do it alone. So far I'm already starting to feel somewhat at ease as the professional I'm talking with is already helping me break up my priority list so I can tackle things one thing at a time.

OK now is the time where I mention again that while Rina is the dedicated retail manager moving her way up, just like her great grandmother did, her twin sister, Tori, is a psychologist in Indianapolis. To say that I am incredibly proud of MY millennials is truly an understatement.

Christmas last year

So that's me checking in for now. With a little more control over my hands I should be able to blog a little more. But realistically, I don't think the next blog will be from me because after reading JDs fill ins Marco has been bugging me that it's his turn. But I think I've got some Christmas pictures and maybe even Christmas music to share this weekend.

Please keep me or add me to your reading list. The positive comments really do keep me going.

Now I need to take a break so I can do some reading and commenting myself!